HMV trip with Candy.

7/11/2004(Sun)
It was a rare Sunday that candy had told me to come out and accompanied her to HMV. Well, ever since I know her, she had not asked me out and I knew she is a type of person that don like to meet friends and love to stay at home and having time with herself alone. Well, today was a rare occurrence. It been a long time I had not been to HMV. Since army and university life, I had little time to step into HMV. Furthermore, I had other commitments and could not listen to 933 charts. After some time, it made me feel the lack of enthusiasm to keep track of the entertainment pop music. Also, the pop idols and pop groups that had become popular over the years made me lose interest to the entertainment as well. Well, Candy and I feel that we are still in the era of Jeff Chang, Zhang Yu songs. We just couldn’t accept what is popular in this age to come. But I still listen to those candy pop songs to keep update a bit on entertainment industry. Today, Candy told me I am not very good at entertainment news compared to the days in secondary school. Well, I guess she is right and I just lost a bit interest and less keen on such stuff. But we are still confident that during our secondary days, our music knowledge indeed was one of the best and will not lose out to anybody. 如果我们认第二，没人敢认第一。We talked a lot about music and our secondary school memories today. We remembered the days when I first bring her to HMV and then she told me she was going into Jap pop and left me alone in the Chinese pop. Well, ever since then, I dislike Jap pop. haha. Even there is no such incident, I think I will still dislike Jap pop because most Jap pop are a bit noisy for me and their make ups look disgusting as well. 可能我的思想比较保守吧， so I think Korean pop is more suitable for me. 韩国人都很保守。We chat quite a lot and she told me I did not give her the feeling that she had in secondary school. She said when she went out with Swee Leng or Choon Yi, she still got the feeling that they are in the secondary school era. And as for me, it is absolute zero. During our last meet up, there is still a bit but today she told me it is absolute zero. This is a bit too exaggerating. I guess she was trying to tell me she is changing faster than me. But everyone will change as time passes by. Well, I guess I had grown up liao. haha. Boys tend to grow up and mature in the later stage of life. Also, Christianity had helped me to shape my character as well. The trials and unhappiness I suffered over the years in army and university had made my mindset changed gradually as well. I now no longer am the Ee Meng who listens to music beyond the limit and had many weird thoughts.(Though I still have some now haha) If I am still having such level of listening to music, having such level of thoughts, I guess I am now suffering from depression or madness or totally pessimistic. (Though I think now I am going to suffer from depression haha.) I used to have such thoughts as Candy’s thinking that everyone who go pub, who smoke, are totally hopeless person, totally bad guy, 无药可救，but now I don have such thoughts. Though I still don like such people especially those who are not my friends, I guess my tolerance had dropped a lot. I had seen a lot of things and learnt to accept things more openly (not that I agree with my friends who go pub or smoke). I will not be shortsightedness because I begin to see things beyond what people can see and experience the world and not the small music world of my own. The music world of each individual sometimes makes it difficult for people to come out of that world, keep immersing into the world of sadness. Sometimes such world can be very scary and I experienced people with such world. That why a lot of music people committed suicide. 曾经有过这种思想,可是现在倒觉得这种思想有点可怕。这种思想会不会从我的脑海里再苏醒过来呢？哈哈


In the evening, we eat our dinner in a Jap restaurant in Taka. Well, I realized we talked a bit loud in such a quiet restaurant. It seemed that everyone in the restaurant can hear what we talking about. Haha. This is usual as we are always agitated talking to one another but usually she talked loudly than me loh. She told me in Jap restaurant, one need to eat very loud to show that the food is nice as a respect to the chef. It is very nice of her to treat me for this meal too. Haha. She ate really slowly, the slowest I ever seen in my whole entire life haha. After a long meal and chatting, we went home.

The next day, Candy told me she was going to buy a tortoise and that I told her if you cannot take care of this tortoise well, it will die and you will have unnecessary hurt. But she replied me:” Everyone will die even I. As long I treasure the tortoise I will have no regrets.” Suddenly I feel that her reply remind me that I perhaps will give such a reply when I am in secondary school. The reply I give her is more realistic type. Perhaps, army life, JC life, University life or Christianity had changed my thinking and I guess I am still transforming every moment every second. Sometimes I am also not certain of myself. I think I am a complicated person. As candy also sms and told me: “After all these years, I still can’t really understands u. You still remain a mystery to me. I think I have lost track of u along the years.”