Autumn in my heart

这个星期， 我再看“秋天的童话”。这是我第3次看了。第一次看全部18 集只不过花我两天的时间而以。希望这次再看的时候，我能暂时离开这个现实的世界，去到戏里的世界。看了第一集，我觉得我看得太匆忙，没有时间给我去体会，去流泪。也许我那时一边看，一边上网。哈哈。 如果你曾经有为一部戏而流泪，这部连续剧你不可能不会流泪。我看戏都会很感动，也许想太多了。如果心里流泪了，那已经感动了我。如果前三集你没有哭，你可能不是人。哈哈。那时在兵营的时候，许多人都很感动，而我一位很喜欢这部戏的朋友还跟他的女朋友去韩国!

两年前看了“秋天的童话”之后，伤心了一阵子。别人看戏时，会有一份感动，而我却会有十份的感动。看完了秋天的童话时，我那时在兵营大概写了二十个词，真的是太多感动了。每个词都有一份的感动，一个故事。如果你没看这部戏，也许不会知道以下的词的意义。 （我看这部连续剧两次了。）我写一些跟大家分享吧。

小时候，恩熙和俊熙都有许多脚踏车的回忆。恩熙因为踏得很慢，不喜欢自己踏脚车却很喜欢坐在俊熙的脚车上面，一起回家。

小时候

小时候 爱那么简单
活得那么单纯 那么天真
小时候 去看海
坐在沙滩 牵挂着回忆
握住着幸福 一起想未来

小时候 一起上学
一起回家 手牵着手
心连心 勾勾小指

小时候 一起踏脚车
踏进爱情里 踏进岁月里
踏进你的心里

没有什么回忆比童年更回味
没有什么人比我更爱你还深
只因有你 生活更光芒
只有你 让我发现爱

词：奕明

在恩熙临死之前，把她对俊熙当时的感受写下来：

我要活下去

我只要跟你说晚安
不要说再见
不要说这次是最后一个晚安
我只要跟你说早安
不要说吻别
不要说这次是最后一个早安
但我最后闭上眼睛
只想握住你的手
在你的拥抱里比上双眼
只想最后看到你一个人
还能安心得闭上双眼
我要活下去
你一定也要活下去
没有我 你也要等我
至少在梦里等待我的出现
在岁月里遇见我的影子
在思念里说声你爱我
这样 我们就可以一起活下去
你说对不对

词：奕明

看海

浪 一波又一波
天 亮了又暗了
我还是为你守候
还是在等着你
浪一来 我就要保护你
无论有多汹涌 多可怕
我不要让它把你带走
连回忆都不能带走
让回忆留在沙里的最深处
我要在沙滩画出我对你的思念
不让浪把我的思念带走
我要在海边呼喊我对你的爱
让风把这珍贵的讯息传达给你
看着海 听着海的声音
听着我们的故事
看着海 听着海的哭泣
让海画出我们的伤悲
让海为我们祈祷
为我们流泪

词：奕明

Korean Dramas

至从我看了”秋天的童话”，我就喜欢看韩剧。 总觉得韩剧能让我离开这个真实的世界， 去体会剧情的故事。我喜欢韩剧因为它们都很感人，主题曲和插曲都很好听。韩剧的剧情都很保守，没有什么强奸或很色情的场面， 不会污染一个人的赤子之心， 不像新加坡的连续剧。韩剧可以超级好笑就像“我的野蛮女友”，也可以超级悲就像“秋天的童话”。 如果你常看韩剧，你会发现很多演员演家长来来去去都是那几个演员。有些人觉得韩剧太罗索， 可是这是必要的。因为观众能慢慢体会和感受剧里的所有的回忆。太快的话， 观众就会觉得时间的绝情，也会更快的忘掉剧里的回忆。 有些韩剧的配音都不错，最重要的是戏里有经典的对白。我就写一些吧：

秋天的童话：
1）能认识你就代表我们又缘，可惜我们没有缘分。
2）如果你真的爱一个人，是不会有任何理由。
3）以后我要当一棵树，树一旦种在一个地方，就不会换地方，一直在那里。这样就不会和自己的家人分开了。

冬季恋歌：
1）误会是不用原谅的。
2）分开的时候，请不要回头看。我不想最后一面看到你的回忆是你的背影。
3）这里的风景很美，你看到什么？你只是看到回忆，你心里被回忆锁住， 你还能爱谁？

夏日香气：
1）你不会担心我吗? 不会，因为我会在你身边。
2）我该怎么样报答你呢？我就报答你一辈子好了。

Jeff Corner

Today so happy to see jeff the next eternity had entered 933 chart!!wow, jeff still maintain 2 songs per album ever since genorsity except for compilation. Even Eva sent in 5 coupons though she always vote through phone only. haha.. Let hope this song will achieve better results than "bai yue guang". When i first listen to this no.17 new song, i cant believe my ears it is jeff song! Though i know in my first hearing it must be jeff song, but somehow i cant believe it till jeff voice was sung in this song. Anyway, jeff song is the highest among the 3 new songs. Well done Jeffians!! To add on to my happiness, fish got 3 songs in the chart in a week as well. Beside Jay, fish surprisingly did it in this year..

Let me recommend some jeff chang reflections with u all (see below) It is taken from jeff book which he is going to released soon..quite meaningful to read.

收藏對我而言，就是”一再的洗淘自已生命”的過程從一決定收集某個東西開始，它就成為你生命部分的印記，一開始，你驚喜於世界的開闊，隨著藏品的增加，你滿足於生命的豐富，直到它們成為你生命的包伏，你不得不重新思考，留下什麼，放掉那些，讓自已有新的空間。而經過這樣的循環之後，你會發現自已更精粹，像淘洗出的沙金，閃閃發光。
所以收藏的哲學對我來說，不在擁有什麼，而是如何挑剔，再挑剔。這樣人生不會很辛苦嗎?某方面可以這麼說，但如果你把收藏當作追求知識或追求真像，那就不得不挑剔了，希臘人從貝殼的螺旋中看到了自然永恒的黃金比例，我想絕非偶然，從蘇格拉底的數學，柏拉圖的哲學到荷馬的史詩，只有如此嚴緊的民族才能找到這樣完美的公式，所以我們能不挑剔嗎?
而挑剔對我來說的另一個角度，也可以說是浪廢生命，而我一直很喜歡”生命，就該浪廢在美好的事物上”這句話，而什麼又是值得用生命去交換的美好呢?我說是”生活品質”因為好的生活品質絕對是創造美好回憶的最佳元素，也是我們努力的動力與快樂活著的最好的理由。
說了這麼多，其實也用來追憶台灣這些年來進步之下流失的美好，希望這些零碎的片段能成為某些人創造更好，更美的將來的一些靈感。

Long weekend

This longweekend I had been slacked most of the time. Partly because i am sick also, down with sore throat and cough. I realised sleep is the most effective but slow medicine, that why i slack this long weekend. No wonder, Jesus also need to rest and sleep during his stay on Earth. haha..

Thursday meet with the sneakies for yuzhou birthday celebrations. Altogether 5 sneakies were present and we had our dinner in HANS and play yugioh in DOME. Everyone seemed to improve and learning yugioh and yugioh fever had not subsided among the sneakies. Seemed that my new deck " Posioning Lifepoint" is not that effective. My green deck or perhaps the wind deck is more effective, the only deck which can curb benjamin blue deck. He even wore blue clothes and jeans to match his blue deck. After all, we had some fun playing a few duels. The sword of revealing light indeed can be a deciding card to win or not.

Friday i just completed about 100 + epsiodes of saint seiya..it is like "zhen qing" but in cartoon version haha..







Saturday i went to buy ahmei and sky album. Exactly ahmei album is not bad too. Perhaps i shall give a review some other day bah..Still listening.Ahmei album need to turn on the vol high and enjoy it. haha..

HMV trip with Candy.

7/11/2004(Sun)
It was a rare Sunday that candy had told me to come out and accompanied her to HMV. Well, ever since I know her, she had not asked me out and I knew she is a type of person that don like to meet friends and love to stay at home and having time with herself alone. Well, today was a rare occurrence. It been a long time I had not been to HMV. Since army and university life, I had little time to step into HMV. Furthermore, I had other commitments and could not listen to 933 charts. After some time, it made me feel the lack of enthusiasm to keep track of the entertainment pop music. Also, the pop idols and pop groups that had become popular over the years made me lose interest to the entertainment as well. Well, Candy and I feel that we are still in the era of Jeff Chang, Zhang Yu songs. We just couldn’t accept what is popular in this age to come. But I still listen to those candy pop songs to keep update a bit on entertainment industry. Today, Candy told me I am not very good at entertainment news compared to the days in secondary school. Well, I guess she is right and I just lost a bit interest and less keen on such stuff. But we are still confident that during our secondary days, our music knowledge indeed was one of the best and will not lose out to anybody. 如果我们认第二，没人敢认第一。We talked a lot about music and our secondary school memories today. We remembered the days when I first bring her to HMV and then she told me she was going into Jap pop and left me alone in the Chinese pop. Well, ever since then, I dislike Jap pop. haha. Even there is no such incident, I think I will still dislike Jap pop because most Jap pop are a bit noisy for me and their make ups look disgusting as well. 可能我的思想比较保守吧， so I think Korean pop is more suitable for me. 韩国人都很保守。We chat quite a lot and she told me I did not give her the feeling that she had in secondary school. She said when she went out with Swee Leng or Choon Yi, she still got the feeling that they are in the secondary school era. And as for me, it is absolute zero. During our last meet up, there is still a bit but today she told me it is absolute zero. This is a bit too exaggerating. I guess she was trying to tell me she is changing faster than me. But everyone will change as time passes by. Well, I guess I had grown up liao. haha. Boys tend to grow up and mature in the later stage of life. Also, Christianity had helped me to shape my character as well. The trials and unhappiness I suffered over the years in army and university had made my mindset changed gradually as well. I now no longer am the Ee Meng who listens to music beyond the limit and had many weird thoughts.(Though I still have some now haha) If I am still having such level of listening to music, having such level of thoughts, I guess I am now suffering from depression or madness or totally pessimistic. (Though I think now I am going to suffer from depression haha.) I used to have such thoughts as Candy’s thinking that everyone who go pub, who smoke, are totally hopeless person, totally bad guy, 无药可救，but now I don have such thoughts. Though I still don like such people especially those who are not my friends, I guess my tolerance had dropped a lot. I had seen a lot of things and learnt to accept things more openly (not that I agree with my friends who go pub or smoke). I will not be shortsightedness because I begin to see things beyond what people can see and experience the world and not the small music world of my own. The music world of each individual sometimes makes it difficult for people to come out of that world, keep immersing into the world of sadness. Sometimes such world can be very scary and I experienced people with such world. That why a lot of music people committed suicide. 曾经有过这种思想,可是现在倒觉得这种思想有点可怕。这种思想会不会从我的脑海里再苏醒过来呢？哈哈


In the evening, we eat our dinner in a Jap restaurant in Taka. Well, I realized we talked a bit loud in such a quiet restaurant. It seemed that everyone in the restaurant can hear what we talking about. Haha. This is usual as we are always agitated talking to one another but usually she talked loudly than me loh. She told me in Jap restaurant, one need to eat very loud to show that the food is nice as a respect to the chef. It is very nice of her to treat me for this meal too. Haha. She ate really slowly, the slowest I ever seen in my whole entire life haha. After a long meal and chatting, we went home.

The next day, Candy told me she was going to buy a tortoise and that I told her if you cannot take care of this tortoise well, it will die and you will have unnecessary hurt. But she replied me:” Everyone will die even I. As long I treasure the tortoise I will have no regrets.” Suddenly I feel that her reply remind me that I perhaps will give such a reply when I am in secondary school. The reply I give her is more realistic type. Perhaps, army life, JC life, University life or Christianity had changed my thinking and I guess I am still transforming every moment every second. Sometimes I am also not certain of myself. I think I am a complicated person. As candy also sms and told me: “After all these years, I still can’t really understands u. You still remain a mystery to me. I think I have lost track of u along the years.”

Suntec with kaifeng on 6/11/04

Last sat, I was on the net, then kaifeng icq me and eventually, we meet up for dinner at cityhall. It been a long time I had not meet kaifeng and we had a nice chat. The last meet up was that time with kwansiang. We had dinner at the foodcourt in suntec and he told me he had found a job as a financial planner in manulife and I feel happy for him as well. We chat about our army life and feel that it is indeed good to be in 3SIR than in other units. Though 3 SIR is tough, but it can prepare for the trials in our later part of life. And as I told him, no boss in a coy can be as bad as alpha CSM. Haha. I think we had chat a bit too long and I was a bit dehydrated already that day. During our window shopping in suntec, I saw mingyoke and xeldon. Mingyoke was shopping with her boyfriend and she recognized me first as she told me I had not changed since our last meet. It was so easy to recognize me. Haha. We chat for a while and she told me she is now working as an admin in mediacorp. Wow, I was so surprised and told her “so you saw a lot of mcs artistes?” And she said “yes.” During JC times, we chat and gossip a lot about artistes and entertainment pop and now she is in entertainment line working as an admin. What a suitable job for her. Then later I meet Xeldon who was shopping with one of his friends in suntec. Hmm, exams coming and still see him shopping. haha. Meet him twice in suntec. First time was before dinner with kaifeng and the second time was after dinner with kaifeng and we were on our way home. I went home early today as I need to catch summer scent in channel U.

Bus

Bus was one of my favourite transportation I like to take compared to MRT. You can appreciate the scenery while taking a bus. Though bus journey might be long, it can give you time for yourself for some reflections. Taking a bus will sometimes let your memories drift slowly in your mind as you leave the place in the bus. MRT seems a bit too fast for memories to flash in your mind. It will remind you for the cruelty of time as memories begin to fade away in your mind. Sometimes when I am down, I will take a longer bus route to reach my destination.

There are always some interesting incidents happening in the bus.
Just last week, as I am taking bus from work, there was an old man offer me a seat during the bus ride. I am wondering why he offered me the seat. Do I look very tired, or do I look so small and yet carry so many things that he think I need to take a rest and sit down. Well, since my destination is reaching, I kindly reject his offer. This is not the first time people had offered a seat to me already. There had been a couple of incidents as well. If I am a kid, I can still understand but I am already an adult. Haha. Still a mystery to me till today.

Another interesting bus incident happened last month as well. While I was holding the horizontal handle of the bus to come out from my seat, the handle came out suddenly. It was so surprising, seemed that I am very strong. HeeHee. Perhaps my heavy bag was another contributing factor as well. Of course, I believed the handle was not firm in the first place already. But I really amazed the people sitting around me in the bus.


About the news on Huang Na, She had died and the suspect was caught..
Though I feel sorry for the child, I also feel sorry for the suspect. Why did he do such a thing? Will he be sentenced to death? Well, hopefully, there are Christians to share Christ to him before he is sentenced to death or sentenced to whatever punishments bah. If I not wrong, there are such Christians doing such service already.